I Killed Santa

Ok, I'm just being dramatic, obviously I didn't KILL the guy. But, my three year old son has been saying for the last 18 months that he's afraid of Santa. He doesn't want to ride the Polar Express to go meet him (can you blame him?), he doesn't want to go to the mall to meet him, he doesn't want him coming to our house. Go figure, my genius kid has already figured out that this character defies the laws of reality and therefor is afraid of him. So, last night, I told him he had nothing to be scared of, because Santa is not real.

IN MY DEFENSE, I explained that Santa only lives in stories, and that he's really a wonderful thing, because he reminds us of the power and magic of giving. I told him that Christmas is a holiday that began because many people believe it is the day when God gave a wonderful gift of hope to the world. I told him that we celebrate Christmas because we believe that hope and generosity are really important, and so we give each other gifts. I also told him not to tell any of his friends that Santa isn't real, because they might not be afraid of Santa, and they might like to believe that Santa is real. I told him for about the millionth time that every family has different stories and rules and traditions, and we should always respect them. About this point in the conversation, he changed the subject and began explaining to me what trucks do.

Here's the thing: my husband and I work really hard, and I don't want some imaginary fat man getting the credit for the gifts we give to each other. How is that helpful? When he grows up, our little guy is going to want to know why his friends got more gifts than he did, and I want him to know the truth. In our family, the holiday is about GIVING, not receiving. Also, I'd rather spend my hard-earned money on a few fantastic dinner parties than a mountain of toys for a child who really doesn't need them. 

So, my husband is kind of mad at me, but he'll get over it. We're still a young family and we're still trying to figure out our own traditions. We have yet to celebrate Christmas in our own home, and so we've just been doing what the family-at-large does. But Rowan is old enough now that he's starting figure stuff out, and I want to control the information he gets. It's absolutely my right as his mom. So, I'm trying to help him see Santa as a non-scary story character who is vital to happenings of the winter holiday, but not the whole story. We will write our own version, like every family does, and it's really important to me that the story shores up with our beliefs. Christmas isn't about gifts, it's about giving; it's not about a strange fat man in a red suit who defies physical law, it's about family and friends who we can touch and feel and hug and sing with and laugh with and spend months thinking about the perfect gift to give, hopefully making that gift, and knowing "They will see how much I love them when they see how much I thought about this". 

Rest in peace, Santa. I'll take it from here.